armsreach

you
seem like ur so close
yet so far away.
and yes
i know, cliche.
very cliche.
but thats the only way i know how to describe
us.
theres not even really an
us,
but kind of.
its like leading on. except.. not really.
you have her.
and on the side,
theres me.
but sometimes
there are those wonderous moments
when i feel like i have you.
and its a slight glimpse of what it would be like
if i really did.. have you.
oh she doesnt realize how lucky she is.
jealousy can be a bitch.

--
means nothing, kind of a continuation of the poem before. just somethin different. :)

feelings

of broken confusion
have now lead into
feelings
of painful uncertainty.
and as i laid there
first gazing at the
bright sunset,
then watching
the hazy night stars,
i wished that you-
no, not you-
but you,
were with me.
but of course,
who am i to think that?
your with her, not me.
constantly,
almost everyday
i want to scream at you,
what does she have
that i dont?
i see her treat u like shit
and know u can do better.
and i feel, selfishly,
that that one better girl
could very possibly be me.
even if,
you feel that way to some
extent,
the hurt is still there.
the fact that your
with her
and not me.
maybe..
maybe someday
you can hold me in your arms
and never want to let go.

--
means nothing:P

run while you still can

little girl
so innocent, so pure
all your dreams and wishes
full of hope, aspiration
why the need to grow up so fast?
you told me
you dreamed of prince charming
and i thought,
sad.
for there is no such thing
yes you'll meet close-to's;
until you really get to know them.
theyr only after one thing
and they break your heart in doing so.
so please.
slow down
and enjoy yourself
for as that pure, innocent, little girl..
you have
no
fucking
idea
what is in store for you.
so live in the moment, for the time to do so..
is slipping away.

sarcasm at its best

sometimes i think of different situations in my head and just write about them.. this is one of those.

oh i dont think you realize the joy
the wonderful feelings i get throughout
when someone you love
someone you think the world about
tells you they have confused feelings for you.
are you ever going to make up your mind?
it seems like your always on the fence about
us.
you,
and me,
together.
i love you.
but you dont love me.
at least not enough.
not enough to risk anything to be together.

help

once again, written awhile ago! found most of these in my old writing journals.

my heart
and my head
are telling me two different things.
my heart
to go to him
but my head
to stay here.
as i am torn between two
i have no idea
what to do.
sometimes
i wish
my head
had a map
to show
where my heart
should go,
so it
would never be lost again.
because lately
i feel lost
in my entirety
wandering in the darkness
confused on what to do,
and what is right for me.
please help me God

the three powerful words

the breeze runs through my hair
as the bright green grass crumples beneath my slender feet
i walk, step by step, the sun slipping below the colorful horizon.
butterflies flutter throughout my chest
as you come into view as you walk towards me,
matching my step, you reach your arms wide for a hug.
you take me into your arms
i feel like the luckiest girl in the world.
i pull away, and look up to see your illuminating smile
bright blue eyes stare down at me, as you lean in for a kiss
our lips barely brush before im in your arms again,
you lifting me up and swinging me around in circles.
i see a whirl of colors, and i laugh allowd to tell you to stop.
an unworldly feeling overcomes my body, a tingly sensation
we come to a stop and im on the ground again, feeling a bit dizzy- i steady myself as i find myself whispering those three oh so powerful words into your ear
you smile, whisper back, and i find myself into your arms once again..

!jump

written the other dayy.. about the current boy. haha. (:

i fall too easily.
and im scared,
shitless,
that im going to get hurt..
cuz its been one hell of a ride,
my crazy life of mine.
theres been a guy who used me
and a guy who broke me.
im holding on to this, hoping this will work out,
and i'll come out of this (or stay in it)
unscathed
cause if you really look at my heart
its still repairing itself
and it still hurts..
that he's with her.
that he doesnt love me anymore.
even though im over them, the hurt is still there
ever present, never to leave.
but slowly,
you
yes you
are helping me get over this.
you dont know about any of this
that has happened to me
and i wish i could bring myself to tell you
but i'm afraid of what you would think of me.
judge me, like so many
others
have done.
i mean.. i love you so much.
i swear to God, i haven't ever loved a guy
as much as you
so should i jump? or stay where i am,
safe, never to give in to this thing we call love?
if you keep your promise
then maybe, just maybe
i'll jump